Come What May- on swallowing your fears.

Theres something beautiful about the feeling of conquering your fears and anxieties. It hasnt yet been a month into the new year and ive already swallowed so many second thoughts that told me that I probably shouldnt do something- and just did it! And let me tell you, it has all turned out wonderfully thus far.

Ive spent the last year avoiding people because too many have hurt me before. I finally sat down and realized that, you  know what, getting hurt is just a part of life and losing people just means there's more space for the new! So I started moving forward.

Of course what happened right then was someone new appeared and i just let it happen. I am so happy I did because they have helped me become a more healthy human being mentally. Im slowly learning how to love myself again, how to just do what i want to do when i want to, and to realize how special the big picture is and just how gifted i am.

Sometimes you have to take a deep breath and let things go and let things happen. Only when you end the halting of your life can truly beautiful things happen to it. Stop denying people access to your life, stop being afraid of spending money, stop being afraid to eat that chocolate bar- if you think that person's cute, talk to them! If you want that tattoo, get it! If you want to eat something, eat it! You'll eventually acquire a healthy balance of life. Alls you have to do is stop worrying.

Zen Writer

I always want to share with other writers the things that have helped me. 

I found a program called Zen Writer that you download to your computer that will set the right mood for you during writing. If youre like me and are unable to write with music on because it creates the wrong vibe, or because you only pay attentiom to the music, then you should check this out.

Zen Writer is a program that becomes full screen when opened, and is essentially like Microsoft Word- except better.

With ZW youre able to change the background picture of the document, when you type it can sound like youre using a typewriter, and you can have a soothing sound occupy your ears.

Since the atmosphere of being on a computer doesnt get me in the mood to write, ZW seriously helped me. Im used to typing on a type writer and the sounds make me want to write- needless to say, this program does the same thing.

I had this for my windows laptop but havent been able to find it for my macbook(let me know if you find otherwise!). 

I love the vibes this program creates because sometimes its so hard for me to want to write. 

you are soft clay,

when you are made to feel hard.

you are the seconds lingering

between the wind-up and the blow-

the time spent wondering

how much it’s going to hurt

when you are meant

to pretend it didn’t.

there are days where

you are going to feel the

emotional imbalance of

being one thing but pretending otherwise.

it is okay to be malleable:

to change from hard to soft,

even at the hands of someone else.

you are soft clay.

you are art,

you are the most beautiful before the glaze,

despite them saying they’re attracted to you

after you’ve hardened.

Christmas

My sister and I have a place together this year, so it's been extra fun decorating it with christmas lights and putting up a Christmas tree together. We finally had a night without her son, so she showed me this beautiful house that she admires every year. There were cars parked on the side of the street in front of the house to look at it as well. This house was decorated even around the back of the house! Take a look:

Say Anything / Saves the Day / Reggie and the Full Effect

I've been slacking on my posts recently so I apologize! School and work were demanding every ounce of my attention, and now that I'm on break I'm trying to learn how to breathe. Despite all of that, I've actually had some time to attend a concert. This year has honestly been the best for shows- I've seen so many of my childhood favorite bands. This month I saw Say Anything, Saves the Day and Reggie and the Full Effect.
I had never heard of Reggie, but by the end of the night they were my favorite performance out of the three. They were dressed up as Santa and elves, and were so lively! They made me want to really get into the music. By the time Say Anything performed (the band I was at the show to see) I was worn out and not into the show. I am absolutely in love with their album In Defense of the Genre, and they performed maybe one song from that album which left me disappointed.
Saves the Day's set was kind of crummy as well because their mic wasn't turned up enough. I love rough sounding music but their set seemed really out of whack.
I think I was more into the theatrics of it all- how Reggie was dressed, the projections Say Anything had, the set up of the venue. I took some wonderful photos of this that I thought were worth sharing:

Winter Playlist from abandonedroots on 8tracks Radio.

It seems more appropriate to be laying in bed with a book 24/7 now that it's winter, but I wanted a playlist to really perfect the feel. Narrowing a playlist down to 8 tracks was almost impossible! Here are some of the songs that I thought were beautiful and moody enough for winter. Enjoy!

Today I finally had a day off of work where I had absolutely nothing planned.
For the last last couple of weeks while at school, I've held back the temptation to go down the street to the crystal shop and buy a bunch of new crystals.
So I decided to fill my free day in World of Rocks. I discovered this crystal shop in September when I was googling places to buy crystals in my area. When I went to check it out, I fell in love. This shop was full of so many different types of crystals, weather raw or tumbled, big or small, everything. There was also a section with a large selection of pieces to make jewelry with such as jump rings, pendants, beads, and so much more.
I had been to crystal shops but they were mostly expensive, already-made crystal jewelry, but this one was so much better and everything I needed for my shop.

I went into the store limiting myself on the amount of money I could spend. By the end of my trip, I had thrown that limit out the window.

I just want to show off the crystals that i ended up buying, and how my collection has grown. It's crazy because I never had any intentions of starting a collection- it kind of just... happened. When I bought my first crystal pendants I didn't even know the powers behind them.

 Today i bought a large amethyst cluster, a large raw rose quartz, a tumbled rose quartz heart, tumbled amazonite, calcite, tumbled opal, and tumbled amethyst.